My first post...
A little nervous to write this even after a very large straight vodka.. I'm 23 and generally a good person when I'm not being selfish and getting drunk. People seem to have a stereotypical view of the average alcoholic but I don't fit that stereotype. Not that anyone should be stereotyped in any way mind you! I did very well at school, was very popular and had hardly any issues. I started working and it all seemed to go downhill - Money wasn't an issue then and I'd drink and do cocaine daily, spending £100 a day on my cocaine habit. I've now known I have an alcohol problem for nearly 5 years. I don't touch cocaine anymore, that was just for a year when i was 19 but alcohol is easily available and much cheaper. I don't drink everyday but when i'm on one, i'm really on it. I can binge on vodka, red wine etc for up to 5 days at a time. Only drinking to cure the shakes and make myself feel 'normal' again. Alcohol has ruined the majority of relationships i've had, from family to partners, jobs - everything. I've recently met someone perfect for me and i cannot afford to ruin it. It gets complicated but basically this is too good to mess up. I can't hide my drinking for much longer so i need to stop. Not just for him but for my sanity, my family's sanity. Not sure what to do as we go out for meals, lunches etc and it's normal for us to drink. I am such a mess at the moment.