Originally Posted by
anvilhead 
Tired of being lied to and let down.
haven't met anybody yet who LIKES to be lied to and let down!!!
there ARE solutions, but they involve YOU breaking the cycle........are you ready to do that?
Really?? I have chosen so many losers you would think I LIKED to be lied to, let down and wanted more of that
YouKnowBetter, your post made me recall an interaction with someone who had used drugs. Literal NONSENSE.
You can't cure anyone.........
You can't just have Jekyll...
He comes with Mr Hyde. Its the Whole Package.
I imagine you'd like someone who doesn't have a Mr Hyde lingering?? there are great men out there, who would NEVER EVER IMAGINE to put you through this, because they have a healthy relation with themselves and are creating things for themselves, they are not set to destroy everything that is good in them and the great people around them.
There are many options. I am glad to report I am now dating Healthier People, and its such a great relief, never to be afraid again, and be able to TRUST, and not expect anything horrible to happen. Also as a social drinker I am grateful the other person can drive me home safely. It doesn't come to that anyway, but you got to think about the role of a partner, in my humble view a partner represents PROTECTION. There is enough stress "out there". I need protection, LAUGHTER, relaxation, enthusiasm and someone to go with me to ride a bike and drink a carrot juice afterwards. Why invite madness in my life? I thought I loved XABF and many others, but it was not love, it was NEED, NEED for tension, for abandonment, for "today I love you, tonight I hate you" toxic interactions...
Therapy has been very helpful understanding why I am attracted to toxic people... well.. why I WAS attracted to them...
I asked HP/God to help me remove my fear of being alone... it WORKED! I feel great.
There is a lot to look forward to !! you can only heal yourself. AND you will do a GREAT job, if you set your mind to it... if you remember you deserve real happiness... not in 20 years.. not "if you do X or Y" or if "Z likes you or not"... nope.. just by being YOU... NOW...
and how do you start going for it? well in my case I started discerning who I welcomed in my life... who nurtured me.. who let me down... I am still doing that today... its hard to let go of people but in the end "We are always alone" as a therapist told me. AND we only get one life.. ONE....