Brokenheart,
As I read through your thread, my thoughts were 'wow she is in tune with herself', so whatever decision you make is seemingly based on what you do know, good and bad.
Your thread also brought me back to my drinking days. When I stopped and the dust settled, I thought everything was boring. No chaos, no having to think of excuses, no long list of apologies to make....After some time however, I grew to love that everything was running on time, that I had peace and appreciated the pace. Life wasn't boring, it was how it should be.