Hi My name is Hailee and I just thought that my experience could help you make a decision about child rearing with an Alcoholic. When I married my husband, we were both 35. He had a son from a previous marriage who was 13 but got divorced when his son was two. My husband begged me for a family, wanted children more than anything--begged me. He had $$, very successful construction business. Our daughter was 8 mos old when he walked out on me the first time.
I thought it was strange that he would disappear for a few days, just because we argued-my parents argued sometimes too-but my dad never left us for days at a time. Got pregnant right away again and when I was 4 months along--I found the empty liquor bottles hidden all over the house followed by dozens of disappearing acts.
I never knew he was an alcoholic. Says he relapsed after 7 years. Divorced the first time for being drunk/not working/rehab multiple times/DUI's. Now history repeats itself.
I stood by for many many detoxes, rehab stays (at least 4), amother DUI -ended up becoming pregnant again accidentally (God has his own plan)! I am blessed with my children. Wouldn't trade them for a million bucks.
I am an RN--my husband was drunk after I completed my shift at the hospital. He lost his whole business. Noone wanted to use his business because he was in rehab or checked into a motel drinking most of the time. He is now in Florida. He abandoned all of us. His parents bought him a condo and a truck down there with cash. We have two little girls 5 and 7 and an 18 mo old son. He has been gone for 1/3 of my son's life.
He is a horrible father. Sure he loves them, but loves the liquor more. Who walks out on their babies and moves 1000 miles away. He just looks for an escape. Hasn't paid one dime in support since October when he took off. We went to church, he had Christian counselor, etc. etc. Alcohol will always come first to him.
Just my experience. Please think very carefully.