Thanks for all those posts.
And yes there is nothing to argue about. And I didn't start writing to argue just to discuess a few things and sure I was a bit disapointed the way some things where said. But that doesn't matter, since everybody has their on opinion and experience.
If he wants to quit or not, its hard to say. Right now, I would say no. But i know that he thinks about it. He even goes to Addiction Counselling.
I set my boundaries a long time ago. Before I knew he had a problem with drinking, I did much more for him, then I do now. I helped him out with money, with Alcohol, picked him up in the middle of the night, when he was somewhere drunk. I'm not doing it anymore. He knows that that those are my rules. He doesn't get any money from me, I am not going out with him drinking, I am not picking him up and I certantly not buying him any booze. He said even to me, he doesn't want to drink at my place. So no drinking at my place. I mean I set that boundarie long time ago, as well. But like I said, he thought it is maybe an idea. Well not anymore. Since I had all the posts here. Doesn't matter where he gets drunk. Since he is back from military jail, he went 3 times out drinking in 2 weeks. So i think he at least tries to cut back.
Maybe some people here had the feeling, I am stupid or so, I am not. I mean I know, that I have to take care of myself and stuff. I decieded for myself to stay with him and hope he is getting better. I still have a big dream and I believe in him, that he can quit again, since he was sober for years. The question for me is more, why is he relapsing so many times and why are all those rehabs he did, fail?
Ya and sailorjohn, that I gonna find my bottom soon? Hm I don't know. I am a pretty ruff character and would say a quit strong person. I grew up with foster parents, my real mom was an Alcoholic and Drug addict, and she was using, even when she was pragnent with me. She died when I was 12 years old. I came to Canada when I was 29, and I managed to live here all by myself alone and with no family. So I think i went through alot in my short life and I never give up so easy, when I see there is still a spark i can hold on to.
But thanks to everybody here. I'm not trying to upset anybody, with the way I am writing, i always try to figure things out.