Quacking all the way to the rehab center
He keeps talking, but all I hear is quacking. "This has never happened to me before." "this might be the hardest thing I ever have to do." and "i'm just scared." And then "I am going to talk to my doctor about extensive outpatient because you guys need me to be here." Why is it that all I hear is Quack. I'm glad this forum gave me a name for it.
Yesterday, on my way home from work, I saw his car at the corner store right by our house. I pulled in and watched as he walked out with one of those 3 pack tall bud lights. He saw me and put it down by the door, then walked out to my car and told me that he went to buy a pack of smokes.
I walked over to the beer, picked it up and tossed it into the trash can and asked him to go home. I followed him home. He gave me his keys and apologized. He had not been drinking, he was about to start. This, I said is why extensive outpatient would never work. He had no choice but to agree.
He explained that he had a bad day. Went to see an employment laywer to see if he could get is job back or sue his employer. They took his fee and told him he didn't have a chance. He then went to unemployment who told him since he was fired he would have to have a hearing and waiting period if he qualified.
He kept apologizing for his "near miss" and thanking me for "saving him".
I went upstairs and did some lesson plans, played on facebook, etc. I didn't get angry or even want to discuss it. Since I wouldn't play the game, he came to me ready to cry asking if I didn't care.
I explained that I'm too tired to fight about it and it was stupid for him to have bought it, and I was tired and asked him to just leave me alone and for him to calm down.
I am still wearing this engagement ring. He wants me to say that I will be here when he gets back. I'm trying to be honest, and still be kind. I don't want to be his excuse not to get treatment. In my heart, I would love if he could turn this around. I would love to be able to grown old with this man, but not like it has been. I am grieving at the loss of the future I was planning with him.
His son stayed at the house again last night. This morning I found him in the kitchen tearing up a Christmas picture that we had taken as a family. His mother told him that "your dad is going to have to go away for awhile." and who knows what else she told him.