Originally Posted by
LaTeeDa 
On the other hand, if you love someone...why would the thought of sex with them make you ill?
It doesn't sound much like love to me, on either side. I say this as someone whose 20-year marriage went down a similar path. There are different kinds of love, IMO. I still love my XAH as a human being, as the father of my children. But, as a husband and life partner--NO WAY.
L
Very good point LaTeeDa. If my husband chose to be nice, responsible, mature, pleasant, helpful, etc. for....oh....let's say....7 days, yes....a full week, I just might be interested in sex with him. Now, I would prefer this to occur on a daily basis, but it just doesn't. The reality is....he does his thing, goes fishing, talks on cell phone nonstop, sits in recliner all evening watching what he wants to watch on tv, etc. There is no connection between he and I or him and the kids. I don't even know if he knows they are in the same house to be honest. But, when he decides he wants sex....he will just appear in the bathroom when I get out of the shower and expect it....and we may not have barely even talked to each other all evening. I just don't get it. (Or should I say HE just doesn't get it!) Literally!!
My point is that his loving caring side only comes out when he wants sex. You see, he is only "nice" because he wants something. And, apparently, he can't plan ahead a week and plan for sex next Wed by starting to be nice now. J/k...the 7 day thing is not a rule I have or anything...just using it as an example.