Originally Posted by
BobbyJ 
I just had to take a minute before I walk into the lawyers office and tell you what is running thru my mind...It's pretty weird...How fast, I fell back to step ONE (UNO)
Im thinking, if I stay married to him and pack up my life and move where he is living
All the problems will go away...
Im thinking, if I support him and give him praise, he wont have a problem with his drinking anymore. He only drinks, because I dont praise & clap my hands...
Oh, BobbyJ, I can completely understand falling into this thinking. Man... It's so easy to do once it's been all we do for years. "If I just try hard enough..." "If I just say it a different way...." "If I just show him how appreciative I am of what he does for every smallest thing he does (like finally take out th garbage after yelling at me to leave it the f- alone)..." things would be better; he'd stop drinking; he'd be nice; I'd be able to be happy....
He--, I even went to a counselor to 'learn to communicate with him' after finding out that he was not only cheating on me, but living with the girl. Now if that doesn't show that the belief that I should be able to help him was
ingrained, I don't know what does.
Please mention the threat to your lawyer. And please remember to take care of yourself through all of this.
