La -- I hear you, but hindsight for me is 20/20. There are a lot of things I wish I would have done differently. This is one of them. So wish I would have done it differently. :-( I know him reading this letter would be a hard one. I can't change him though, so I am figuring out how I can change the thought processes of the one person I can change --myself. Wish I would have been more deeply in Al-Anon when the ultimatum went down. I will say, however, that I did say "sober and following your program." Not sure he is really doing that though so not sure where I stand. Thank you for your feedback though. Truthfully thank you.