So last night after the cheesecake factory, I came home to what I thought would be a peaceful night, so wrong. We rented a pay per view movie and snuggled in to watch it, and within 20 minutes, the back door swings open, and it is the woman who's house he had gone to. I have met her before, at a sports bar where we sometimes watch games. I actually liked her, but she is definately a party girl. She met him at a bar and dated him for a couple of months, before me. When really drunk, he will compare her to me and at one point when I said I wasn't going to Vegas to marry him as we have plans to do, he said he was going anyway and would just take her. I never react to that one and just usually tell him that's fine. When I saw them coming in I sent dd to the neighbors to play with their daughter for a little while.
He could barely walk, and had a beer in his hand. I took it and dumped it down the sink and told him to go to bed. She said that in an attempt to help him pass out, she had also given him a hydrocodone and muscle relaxer. When that didn't work, she brought him back to me.
So he refused to go to bed, and was slurring words, talking out of his head. At the same time, the mother of his child showed up, yelling that she wanted to come into the house and get some of his things. I told her that it was not a good time and she needed to leave. She proceeded to let her son into the house and told him to go upstairs to get his things (he is 8). I met him at the door and took him back to the car, told him that I love him and I would bring his things to him later.
So drama over, party girl and ex gone I put collected my daughter, ut her in the car and we went to the theater to watch the wimpy kid movie.
I figured he would be passed out when I got home, wrong again. I was sure there was no more beer in the house, wrong again.
Her bedroom is downstairs, so we went there, played some wii, she went to sleep. At 1am I figured he was asleep and went upstairs to turn some lights off, clean up a little and get clean clothes for myself to sleep in.
He was sitting at the computer listening to music, with another beer by his side. I dumped that one out. And told him to go to bed.
He said he would only if I would go with him, and exhausted as I was, I said fine. Within 10 minutes, he was dead asleep and I managed to make my way to the guest room.
This morning as I left for work he was begging me not to leave him. Telling me that everything better started today. I told him that when I got back, he should have his mess cleaned up. There is a broken glass in the kitchen, I just left it there. I havent' cleaned any mess that isn't mine or hers and I haven't done his laundry in days now, he may have nothing to wear. My daughter won't be here for the rest of the weekend, she has a sleepover with a friend tonight and her dad is taking her tomorrow night.
The biggest decision now is what to do:
1. move home, which would mean quitting my job and living with my sister or mother until I find a house or apt to rent. Would also mean pulling dd out of school. It would mean that he would be 5 hours away, not a drive across town.
2. Get an apartment across town, close to the school where I work. This would also mean changing dd's school, because currently I can drop her off at before school no earlier than 7am. I have to be at work at 7am. I could move her to the elementary which is next to the middle where I work, our schedules would be similiar, but I hate to move her. I also wonder if he would actually leave me alone.
3. Convince him to get out for 3 months. It is his house, his mortgage. Actually it is also his mother's mortgage. She is stressed right now thinking about the fact that he has lost his job and that her name and credit is out for his mortgage. If she is smart, she will come put the damn thing on the market, sadly it is worth much less than they paid for it, not only because of the market, but because he hasn't taken very good care of it. I would be stretched to pay the whole thing on my own, but it would be only for 3 months. The trick would be actually having him stay out.
Wow, ive written a book. If anyone has actually read all of it, please give me some thoughts.