Hi Japabp2000,
You have come to the right place for help, I can tell you that. I am sorry that I dont have many words of wisdom. I do know that until he wants help, he wont stop abusing drugs/alcohol. There are places that do not cost , I believe that Salvation Army has a program, which is free, under certain conditions.
As much as you want to help him, he must really want to help his self. You can only help you. Which is the best thing for everyone involved.
I am sorry that this is happening. Please stick around, and someone who can be of help will be along.
is there any way that you can get to alanon, considering your anxiety? actually, this is a great place to learn too, and you can be part of a group, without the actual face to face.
welcome to a great place. hang in there, and focus on what will help you right now.
hugs
chicory