I know it seems hopeless, but those kids need you to stand firm.
She is a drowning person, and you trying to help her could take you under. It sounds like she is taking you under already. And those boys need one parent eho is not under water.
You cannot help her, or your kids if she is this erratic, abusive and it sounds like she is not in a place to care about how they are affected.
You are being abused. Even if you are bigger than her.
She is abusive and neglectful toward the kids.
Is there anyone in your family who can come and stay while you get her out? Anywhere, her dads?
Please dont let pity be the reason you dont take action to protect the kids. If you start thinking like that, try shifting your feelings of pity toward the kids, and let that fuel you to continue taking the proper action to protect them.
I know its harder done than said.
Please keep posting, and keep looking for a better lawyer.
I will be praying for you and your children.