In regards to what wanttobehealthy said,"unreal. I am so sorry. Clearly your H is no where near behaving in ways that are consistent with recovery-- maybe he's sober (or maybe not) but it's not the drinking that makes him an alcoholic and it sounds to me like you are in for a long road with him... " That was a real eye opener for me! Can you explain that in more detail? Another thing that has been bothering me, is he is now smoking Mr Nice Guy. My husband is an alcoholic and an addict, both his sponsor and counsler have told me that is not acceptable, but in my husbands head he does not believe he has a problem with pot, which is what he used to smoke but he thinks by smoking Mr Nice Guy it's ok. By hearing this, IS he really not working the program? IS he in major denial? So maybe all this is about his character and not about the alcohol at all. He has said to me let me work the program the way I want, is this the correct way of thinking, cause if it is not, I would like to share this with him. He does go to 1 or 2 meetings a day, for his 90 in 90