My limbo happens in degrees.
There was the limbo of years kind of 'waiting' for him to shape up, while he was active.
There were years of having given up on his changing, but still having a child with him.
There was the limbo while he was in rehab, wondering what that meant to me, etc...
There was a different limbo, when he came out and moved in w us, and he was sort of flailing around, sleeping a lot, not working, then working, but not working a program.
There was the initial limbo of forcing him to leave, and having to deal with that change, not knowing what would happen to him...
NOw I am exiting limbo, mostly, but...
Limbo wont change for anyone living with an addict if you are focused on them more than you. And all those years of limbo, for me, were uneccessary.
I could have detached, truly, I could have moved on.
I could have made choices that stopped limbo a long time ago.
I guess my point is that limbo is a choice, and it wont change until you step out, do your healing work around why you are remaining in limbo with another person who is not taking part in life, and let go of any fantasies that keep you in limbo with them, or toward them...
JMHO