There is nothing wrong about caring.
Caring is a natural human emotion. But please, do not call and offer him your couch.
Thanks for confirming for me what I guess I already knew!
If you toss that bone to him now, there is no telling where it will lead.
You're absolutely right. Thanks! Thank God for this board-- this is why I posted-- I needed to be reminded that my knee jerk inclinations aren't good for me...
He is a grown man and is perfectly able to find a place to stay. You said offers had been made but he still stays at his job. Bad decision on his part since it could cost him his job. It just shows that he is still not making good decisions and that is not your fault, nor is it your responsibility.
I can definitely see how he is still sitting around waiting for things to happen to him instead of taking action... my worry is that his sitting around waiting is going to hurt the girls and I if he gets fired.... I don't want to help him problem solve but I also don't want him to get fired bc of what that will mean for our kids... I feel between a rock and a hard place a bit....
Also don't forget, your girls were scared at your mom's house. They do not deserve to have to live being afraid at night.
No I haven't forgotten and thanks for putting this in black and white in front of me... I guess I was thinking about his feelings/needs before those of the girls and my own and even though it feels foreign and I feel bad for him, I guess what I am doing is healthy and I will stay the course.
I offered that he could stay here some nights and I'd go to my moms but honestly, I don't feel confident about leaving him alone, overnight with the girls. I don't trust that he is not drinking and the thought of him drinking being here alone with the girls is not something I am or ever will be okay with again...