Hi Alone22,
Welcome to the forum, check out the "Sticky" section on top of the page.
Have you tried Alanon? real life support is priceless. Just knowing someone else understood, was huge!!
Also about peace and happiness, I am going to therapy and it has been the best decision I ever made, to help me find those answers for myself and start thinking clearly. For me.. once things are crystal clear, the next action to take is easier to identify and to do, because then I have a sense of direction, of purpose.
Please keep reading/posting
!