Originally Posted by
threewishes 
I met his sister for dinner last night and was having a good time until we started talking about him, at which point it became real obvious that she thinks I'm somehow to blame in all of this, am completely overreacting by divorcing him, and his family will "be here to pick up the pieces" after I leave and "take care of him" - he's just a helpless lost soul, poor guy. And of course he's going to relapse, with all this stress I'm putting on him!
Oh yes! I tried to explain "detachment" to my A's parents last night and why I'm trying so hard to do it (um, because I'm pregnant and looking at being a single mother of two?! because someone has to be responsible for these kids?!), and his dad looked at me and said, "But don't you think it's important to remind him of what he needs to do?" They don't get it. If this spirals out of control and I do end up leaving my A, my A's parents will be the worst thing that ever happened to his disease.
Good on you for drawing the line in the sand. We don't need everyone's validation and blessings to take care of ourselves.