I think the main reason there is no crosstalk in alanon is to keep you focused on the topic at hand. By doing this, you, even in the midst of your crisis or unhappiness, are being trained for a short period at a time to focus on things other than your story.
I was initially put off by this in the beginning as well. The before and after is for sharing and the phone lists are there as well. I did not use either initially. I think that was part of my keeping people at a distance and looking for general support without allowing anyone to get too close.
The program forced me eventually to get involved with people one on one by staying or calling.
In the end, it was a good thing I think. If they allowed crosstalk, we would get the interaction we are looking for in the meeting and would just disappear afterwards and not use the phone list.
You would in a sense still be isolating yourself. I would have, I know.
In the long run, I could see the benefit of insisting that I stop and hear other people and think of something other than my story.
I always felt better after a meeting even with no crosstalk.
A reprieve from my squirrel cage?