I'm somewhat new to all this too, but the way I understand a boundary is based on what behavior you are not willing to deal with and then making it known and what you will do if the boundary is crossed. Example: it upsets me when you drink, so if you chose to drink then don't come home. Go drink somewhere I don't have to be around you. OR since you snore when you drink, and therefore I can't sleep you need to go sleep on the couch.
What you have discussed above seems more like a demand. You will not do X until he does Z. I think you could make it into a boundary by rephrasing it .... If you chose to drink, then I don't want to waste my time in counseling. If you chose the path of recovery I would be open to going back into counseling.
I have a hard time with the difference of setting a boundary and having consequences for negative behavior. Can they be the same? Seems like it to me.. you drink, you snore, the consequence is sleeping on the couch.
What I am having trouble with currently is understanding if I have set a boundary, simply punishing him or letting my reaction be the consequence to his behavior (everyone says they need to feel the consequences of their behavior) . I reached a new low with my AH. With all the lies, continued drinking, moody attitudes, walking on egg shells, being a married single parent, etc, I have no desire to be intimate with him. He crossed my boundary of how I deserve/need to be treated, and now the consequence is me not wanting to be with him. I'm sure he feels it is punishment. Can it be all three, and is that okay? I've decided I needed to do this for ME for my recovery. There has been way to many times I have been intimate with him out of fear of his attitude if I didn't. It made me feel very unloved and used, which is not a healthy way to feel.
The people here have great wisdom with this stuff. I'd like for them to help us both out on this one. Gets a bit mixed up in my head as you can see.