As someone who battles depression, I'm a huge fan of therapy. I see someone when I'm in the depressive cycle, and have seen a marital counselor with my A before we knew he was an A. I'm seeing one on and off now while I decide whether or not to leave the guy and get on with my life or wait it out and see if he really can turn the corner. I second the reaction that good therapists are worth their weight in gold, and a bad therapist will leave you more effed up than when you walked in there. I've seen both. Some aren't equipped to deal with addiction, and if that's the case, try your hardest to find a new therapist. I was googling stuff about therapy and PTSD this week and found
a link online about finding a good therapist. It's about dealing with rape and sexual assault and it's on a feminist blog but it's basically a politics-free blog post, and I'm sure it could be helpful for other trauma experiences too, like growing up with or being in a relationship with a manipulative, dismissive alcoholic. Anyway, it has some suggestions for finding a good therapist regardless of whether you have access to insurance.
My A is seeing an addiction counselor in addition to attending meetings. I suspect he's going in there and reporting that everything is hunky-dory and A-okay, which means the therapist then doesn't have anything to work with. All she has is what he tells her so there's nothing to work with, and he gets to come home feeling like he's doing his part even if he isn't using that time or resource as it's meant to be used. He hasn't gotten worse over time, but he hasn't gotten any better either. And because he's a well-enough-functioning, manipulative drunk I can't even tell whether he's sober or not. :/ BTW, I'm uber-cranky about the situation today IF YOU CAN'T TELL.
