Gaslighting for me:
Convincing me that I don't remember specific events and arguments correctly, by lying or manipulating or even threatening
or
Constantly telling me I was crazy
or
Trying to convince me that I was lying or had hidden secrets even I had forgotten
It eventually lead me to seriously doubt my own memories, and thus my sense of self-esteem...which in turn seriously undermined any desire or effort to leave the relationship. I thought I was worthless, broken and that I *needed* him to fix me, to tolerate me and to love me.