The other thing I find frustrating about Al-anon is the righteous attitudes people have in those meetings. They say things that seem so arrogant, as if the steps and the rules they live by are above all else and anyone who doesn't live their way of life they are some how lesser "enlightened" than they are. All the answers to life and how to live a healthy life are not found in Al-anon.
Many times I feel Al-anon is just as extreme as co-dependency but to the other direction. There maybe some people need that to learn a new way of life. In my opinion, it is just learning new coping skills to deal with an alcoholic and repressing true feeling. For me, life is about seeking balance. Not one extreme to the next.