Sorry you feel ignored and not valued.
IMO - going through this twice - men don't talk through things well. In my first, everytime we drove home from the lawyer's office he was in a panic and asking me what we were doing. My response was always, lets get the kids situated and then talk about what we really want to do. I wanted out but was willing to stay if he gave me a good reason. Those talks never happened. Once the kids were situated, he put on his headphones and never came out.
Number two, he was the one who was always threatening to leave but wouldn't. So I had to ask him to leave. I just thought he could get sober and maintain it better without the benefit of responsibility for others. He called often to say he knew what to do and talked a lot but in his behavior and choices remained a staple. For all his talking, nothing changed about him.
On the other hand, talking or not talking with a spouse changed me and so I took charge of my own thoughts and feelings. It is easier to take action when you are honest with yourself and then it doesn't matter if they want to talk or not. Isn't that what they are doing too? Behavior says a lot about what is someone's mind.