Ladybug. I think I just posted on your thread while you were posting on mine! What I realized today is that I don't think AH (maybe I am giving him too much credit) even realizes how much he tries to manipulate. It's just his standard operating procedure with me and when I change the dynamic by not responding in my usual way, he just increases his usual methods. Usually this means I break and respond eventually and the dance goes on. I think that if I spend any time at all near him for the rest of the weekend there is a strong likelihood I will snap and give him what he wants.
His parents (he made these plans without checking with me) are coming to our house tomorrow to see D3 for her bday. It will be a cold day in hell before I leave the girls alone with him, let alone with him and his family so I told him I WILL be here and will set a time limit for the visit with the girls and I. He is welcome to spend the entire day with his family but the girls will not be subjected to them for more than an hour or two. I just hope I can keep my cool and not take the bait for that hour or two... Deep breaths!