Hugs, Coffeelover. I did a couple free consults, I spoke with a legal assistance group, but made just over their income limit so couldn't continue with them. The assistant for a family law attorney who specialized in cases with DV and abuse told me they couldn't do a free consult, but she gave me pointers on what I should be doing or information I should be getting from the attorney when I found one. She basically gave me a mini pointer consult over the phone.
The attorney that I got most of my help from is doing a payment plan for the amount over the retainer. I hear ya about the cost thing; trying to come up with money for day care is very challenging this summer.
I started filing the divorce on my own. I researched everything I could before filing, I went to the class on divorce and kids that the state requires (XAH never did), I researched parenting plans online and at the library, I pulled samples of parenting plans, and downloaded the forms to fill out from the state's court site. I made my initial draft of the plan every thing I wanted (at least what I knew to ask for), knowing that if he contested, I'd probably have to give on some of it. But if he didn't contest, I wanted everything lined out.
BTW, at least here in AK, you can see copies of the non-confidential papers in divorce cases, including the parenting plans.