Originally Posted by
DestinyM 
I just want to say I know all about DV and the cycle of violence. It's been a pattern in my life since HS. I'm speaking to my AH but not living with him. I have not let him near my home since the incident. I have even me t him somewhere public. I actually have a protective order and even with that keep a safety plan. I'm grateful to God for bringing Al Anon in my life because I have done the DV counseling and the pastoral counseling and one on one counseling and no one once told me anything about the disease and what it could and has done to me. My grandfather was an A but my parents weren't, but that stinking thinking was set in my mom. I never knew any of this until 4 weeks ago when I found Al Anon! All the other counselors were judgmental in my "relapses" and my insanity it is only Al Anon has given me the knowledge, strength, encouragement and hope that I will be okay. I may stumble, even fall but I can with my HP get back up.
I too didn't know any of this until 18months ago, when a friend listening to me, suggested that I try Al-anon. During our 22yr marriage, and several counseling sessions, not once had I ever considered alcoholism to be the root problem, causing many of our conflicts. Never was it suggested by the councilors either. I currently see a councilor who has a lot of experience of working in the field of alcoholism and it makes all the difference talking to someone who understands the dynamics. I come to SR for people who relate.
Keep going to Al-anon, it really does work at eliminated that heavy, head spin, overwhelming feeling and getting some more peace in life. I have learnt a lot through Al-anon but got to a stage where I wanted to deeper analyze my thought patterns a bit more with my particular circumstances through counseling. If you do require counseling to move on, make sure you research and find someone with experience of alcoholism.