Thread: My Inner Demons
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Old 03-09-2011, 03:09 PM
  # 28 (permalink)  
Tuffgirl
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
selman, we all thought we were different in some way, shape, or form. Again, you are not alone in your thoughts. I would be lying if I hadn't thought and wished my RAH dead on occasion. I did scream "I hate you" at him repeatedly - not a behavior I am very proud of after the fact.

Much of what I did for love has come back to bite me in the arse. I am dealing with those things one step at a time. I just bought my own house. I am taking inventory of the furniture I need to replace now that I gave all of my stuff away, I am working each day to take care of my kids who are affected by this, and so on. All of us here have arse bites. I love that word, btw. Arse. Ha ha!

Al-Anon can help you; please consider meetings if you haven't already. There's one participant in my group who, every meeting, announces to each of us with full eye contact, that he loves and accepts us, God loves and accepts us, and we are all ok. The first time I heard that I was a little taken back - wow that was really cheesy dude. Now five meetings later, I hug him for it. This week, this stranger is the only person who has actually told me they love me. That's what I get from the meetings, on top of guidance... acceptance.

Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way today. Hang in there.
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