Thread: wrong thinking
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Old 03-09-2011, 05:15 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
StarCat
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Join Date: Dec 2010
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Ah, the old "If I leave, I will die!" story... Yes, I had that problem, too. "Who will take care of him?" "Everyone will hate me!"

I left, and he's still alive. He's using up a lot more sick days, his hair is completely white, and he lost a ton of weight (but he was overweight to begin with and still is). He got the proper dose of his lung medication and can finally breathe again, so I'd say the alcohol he is drinking is causing the rest of his issues, because his medical condition is being handled.
I couldn't make him stop drinking when I was with him, I had that experience before, so why do I think I can make him stop now? I can't.

Who will take care of him? Right now his codependent family, unfortunately, but he is a grown man and can take care of himself when he wants to. It's not a matter of "can't," it's a matter of "won't," and I'm not signing up for that.

But everyone will hate me! Just his family, and you know what? I just don't talk to them either. Ah, life, uncomplicated. I could get used to this.


My current issue:
"But if I'm not near him how can I tell what he's going to do next and when?"
I am working on convincing himself that I don't need to know this. Either he will leave me alone, or he will try to contact me again. I just need to get myself organized with what I'm doing if/when he tries to contact me again, so that whenever the "when" is, I'm ready. Beyond that, it doesn't really matter, does it?
One day at a time. One thought at a time. Checklist. I'll be ready.
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