Starlight,
CryanOak has the best idea, here!
I write down my fears like this, everytime they come up.
I then correct the mistaken belief behind that thought by writing the truth, the opposite. If you do not believe it yet, you can write things like,
"MAYBE I will be so much happier without him, and I dont even know it, and I deserve to find that out..."
The thing is, writing these fears and letting them sit there, is only half of the work. Challenging the fearful thought with a counter idea is progress.
I have been doing this, and it has reduced my anxiety sooooo much!
One of my big fears has been about being alone, parenting alone.
Through writing it down I have come to really realize that I have actually BEEN alone all along, and it will be so much better to not have a "fake' supportive relationship.
With As, and RAs, we come to settle for the minimum, and we forget that life can be great without the drama, the pretend help or support.
If you gain a lot from being with him, ask yourself this:
At what cost?
Are you willing to stay and love and be loved by this man at ANY cost to you, your soul, your kids(if you have them)?
Do you miss your friends, the freedom to do as you like, to explore life?
Asking yourself if he makes you unhappy or if you are incapable of being happy is a good thing.
You deserve to find that out, and then remedy it.
Good Luck! And asking these questions is a great start!