Thread: Is it normal?
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Old 03-06-2011, 06:13 AM
  # 58 (permalink)  
chicory
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Join Date: Jul 2010
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Detach with love-how to do that, is the question.

S is so negative and depressed, and when I even speak, he will take the opportunity to try to push my guilt buttons.
I don't wish to spend this time not speaking to each other. I can't even say "Hi", without him adding "how do you think I am doing, with being homeless coming soon?" or something manipulative like that.

Or the recently popular phrase- "Just when things are looking up for me, with four job possibilities. No use now, I wont even be able to get one paycheck before I have no where to go".Even I have to laugh at this one!

guess he can't count, in that there are about three weeks left in the month. Or when he calls me at work, to ask where he can sell his car, since he can't get it going and insurance, etc, before he has to leave. That he could use the pocket money when he has to hit the road.

Tell me that a grown man cannot figure out how to call a junk yard and ask if they want to buy the car? Why would you ask your mom, when your dad, or anyone else could answer that? more manipulations. guilt button is his favorite .

This really hurts, to do, and he knows that. But, would not the sane person be out busting their a@@ to try to do something that might prove they are trying? Or is it the better choice to just lay back, depressed , sleep all day. he makes more effort in going out to pick up cigarette butts, after midnight.

I just don't know how to talk to him right now, and I hate to have silence between us, up to the time he has to go. he is angry, and how do you maintain detachment with love, in face of someones angry manipulations?

I remind myself of how he has been so nasty, a lot of the time. But, I dont want to exude resentment.
I am feeling such a depression coming on, and I am on meds already for that.

It does not help to hear of someones son found dead the day after they put him out, due to his addictions.

I is so weird when your A does not drink, due to no funds, for a long time, and it almost seems that they dont have a problem if they are not selling off your things for booze. but when you know from experience that when they do get some money, they will be drinking it up, instead of saving it to get on their feet, or using it responsibly. I love the excuse "It wasn;t enough money to make a difference in my situation- why shouldn't i have some relaxation with friends (on computer)?

There must be quite a lot of folks online who post till they pass out-


just venting, and trying to get out of this funk.

thanks for listening ,
hugs
chicory
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