olivetree, I was always willing to put my issues second to my XAH's much more important ones. I expect I will always have that independent, I can handle my own problems tendency, but I'm not in a relationship, and I know that I won't ever be with someone who has big issues that take precedence over mine again. No matter how well I can manage my life, I won't make it second to "his" (whoever "he" might turn out to be).