Originally Posted by LexieCat

Sorry to hear about your situation. It must be a HUGE shock--very few people are able to hide a drinking problem that severe for that long. Though some people are more susceptible to physical damage from the drinking sooner than others.

The one thing you might try is educating yourself about alcoholism. There are two books I recommend that you read: "Under the Influence" and the "Big Book" of Alcoholics Anonymous. I strongly suggest that you read both of them, and you will have a better idea of what it is you are dealing with.

I also suggest that you make the books available to him to pick up and read when he is ready. I wouldn't nag him about reading them, but you could tell him you found a couple of books that taught you a lot about alcoholism and that they might be helpful to him, too. Then leave it alone. Let him make his own conclusions and decide what HE is going to do about HIS problem.

For yourself, I second the suggestion that you get to some Al-Anon meetings. This is a scary situation for you, and one you didn't see coming. The others at the meeting will be a great source of strength for you as you navigate these strange waters.

Welcome, and hugs,