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Old 02-24-2011, 09:46 AM
  # 11 (permalink)  
Shellcrusher
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 821
Amerce72,
My old man was one rough individual. I don't feel like sharing any of those stories.
I'm going to write about me. Take what you want and leave the rest.

Here's what I found. I was a typical troublesome hardheaded son who fought him tooth and nail on everything. In my later years, I realized that about myself. Once I knew that, I realized that my old man wasn't actually talking down to me. It's just how he talked. I learned to accept that versus taking it personally.

I remember on Father's Day, many years ago, I apologized to him for somethings I did. He sloughed it off and I thought, whatever man. I tried. That was a turning point for him. It was a big deal for both of us and I think that by taking action to satify my own motives, he was able to move on and be my friend. It's taken us a long time, he still won't say he loves me, struggles with hugs but I know for a fact that he's my best friend and I'm his and we completely enjoy each other.

If you feel like you're missing something with your father, nobody else is going to make a change unless you make one for yourself. If you read around enough, you'll see some common themes in here. One of the biggest is to make sure you're happy and working on you. I may be wrong, but it seems like you have a lot of weight on your shoulders. I get it. If by writing him a letter, you'll be able to lighten the load, then by all means do it. As with other alkie situations, don't expect a response from him. Just do it for yourself.
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