(((Jo))))
I'm so sorry you are going through this again. I have to say that I have never encountered a young adult who admits to a problem with drugs having "a little problem." I suspect if it was a little problem, it never would have become a noticeable problem.
Hes my son, I want to support him, get him help, but I keep hearing those "he needs to do it himself blah blah" advice posts. After loosing my sister Im not sure I can wait, again, for him to do it himself. Hes nearly 24.
As a mom who had 2 kids struggle and lost one to drugs, I completely understand what you are saying. I guess the thing is that even when we want to help and support, if they aren't ready, they aren't going to find their way. I finally realized all my "support" was really protecting my daughters from the consequences of their actions and controlling first their use, then their recovery. Once I stopped doing that and said I am here to support you when you are ready, they became more willing to do some of the work to ease their own pain.
I did provide info on rehabs and encourage it...to this day I do not believe that is enabling. If my child had some other serious health problem, I would research and provide info on the best treatment options too. The choice is hers to make, but I don't see the harm in providing information.
I'm not saying ask him to leave...I don't think anyone can tell anyone the best thing to do. I will say, however that when I was honest with my kids; when I learned to say what I meant and not say it mean...when I didn't get myself sucked into the drama and let them know that they had the power to choose what was next, I think they were forced not to be in denial about where they were at. Unfortunately our kids can spiral down in their addiction just as easily, if not easier, from the warmth and safety of a parent's home as they can anywhere else.
Mom to mom hugs...I really am sorry you are going through this. Prayers that your son makes some wise choices soon. Don't lose faith in your HP's answer...you never know when it will come or how it will be delivered.