I think it's super complex and hard to define. I also think it's subjective. I also have a hard time reading that book because the first several chapters are so "all inclusive."
I suspect that if I applied the same conviction, concentration, love, empathy, remorse, concern, etc., to a non-alcoholic, I may in fact be a great husband who cares. Since my Wife is an A, I am therefore a codie. I'm generalizing and I know it. I'm not exactly happy with how the foundation is laid out but just like some of these threads, I'm taking what I want and leaving the rest.