Hi Cat!
Wow, sounds like a lot on your plate. One thing we learn about around here are the 3 C's:
You did not cause the addiction.
You cannot control the addict.
You cannot cure him.
One thing that would certainly lower the stress level for you allowing him to make the appointments, phone calls, and arrangements he needs to get himself into rehab or inpatient psych evaluation. Is there some reason why he could not do these things for himself? I can only just imagine how on edge it makes you feel trying to "keep all the balls in the air" so to speak!
Keep reading and keep posting. You are among people who truly understand!!!!
Hugs, HG