Thanks, sailorjohn...this is what my Aunt explained yesterday. I was pretty mad at AA, thinking surely someone there will lean across the table, stick a finger in his face, and say you are a QUACKER, dude. Get real.
But no, that's not how the program works. And his in-authenticity is probably why his sponsor comes across as not very invested, either. My Aunt said, why invest in someone who is not serious? As a sponsor, you can tell. And she's let people go for this very reason, "Come back when you are truly ready". She said cases like this are super energy draining and most sponsors would rather focus on those who are serious and ready to make some real life-altering changes.
However, they will let him keep coming back, for as long as he wants, and keep him engaged but at a distance, because at least he is there and not out drinking. And maybe someday he will "get it", that is he is only really faking himself.
Everyone here is right - its easy to pick up on a person not being authentic and genuine. They never get specific, you can't pin them down on anything, they are easily angered and defensive when they are called out, and they come off as being just fine all the time.
I also recognize I need a few more open AA meetings under my belt. Will try to catch one this weekend. I have two old-timer recovering alcoholics in my life that I can talk this over with but actually seeing a meeting would be really beneficial.