Contact for you is like a drink for him. A slip.....but I did it until I finally realized it was hurting me. I got to a place where I wouldn't do it to myself. I saw his manipulations trying to hook me back......sex, guilt....., he kept the cat because she was half wild and she stayed outside 95% of the time. His last manipulation was calling me and saying the cat was dead and hadn't been home. (I lived 45 minutes away) I called a neighbor who said the cat was fine. He exhausted every hook/manipulation......In Alanon we called them King/Babies.......he didn't want me enough to quit using to save the relationship but he wanted to lure me back into the insanity. Selfish.....control....... Three years post divorce...which was very sad ....hard....long and drawn out......I am fine. No contact is the way to go for me. There is no point. He still uses and is out of his right mind. Life is too short. I gave him to God. Let go or be dragged.