This IS hard.
I'm learning to detach too and it sucks.
I want my husband to be a kind and normal person....
but honestly I don't think he is...under all that alchoholic behavior is one major selfish b$%^&#$ and that is NOT my fault. I too was blinded by the alcohol.
That is why I'm going to alnon.
I need to learn to love myself enough to decide where my boundaries are and what is too much to handle for myself and my kids.
It's hard not to step in and 'fix' everything ...
but I can't keep doing that.
I don't WANT that kind of control
I want a spouse...not another kid!
Alnon...I'm hoping will help me sort it all out and decide for myself.
I hope so at least.