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Old 02-15-2011, 04:43 PM
  # 17 (permalink)  
LexieCat
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: South Jersey
Posts: 16,633
I never like to hear someone advise another person to "leave him now" (unless, of course, there is abuse involved or it's not a serious, committed relationship). People need to make those decisions for themselves, in their own time. Alcoholics are sick people. That doesn't justify how they behave at times, but for myself, I could not bring myself to leave until/unless I had satisfied myself that he truly was not ready to quit drinking and I needed to leave for my own well-being. If I had left sooner, just because people told me I should, I think I would have suffered from feelings of guilt and regret.

And some people DO recover. I happen to know a lot who have. So I think zrx's estimate of his chances as "almost ZERO" is unnecessarily pessimistic. Which, in my mind, is just as unlikely to result in a happy outcome as unrealistic optimism.

I suggest getting to some Al-Anon meetings, and also learning what you can about alcoholism. Those two steps will help you get started with getting your own feelings straight about how you can make good decisions for yourself, regardless whether he recovers or not. He may decide to get well or he may not be ready. When the time comes, you want to be able to make an informed decision about what's best for YOU.
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