Thanks all, your posts were very helpful, and the ones that admitted they didn't feel better after divorce helped me to take inventory of myself. The ones that did feel better gave me hope.
My main crazy feeling is inside. I don't yell, or keep track of him or nag him. I'm more sad, really sad that my marriage has ended without my permission.
I guess I'm in the phase where I'm feeling down a lot and I hate to feel down.
I did find some huge help last night. I read the 4th step and printed out some worksheets that go with it on resentment and fear. Basically an inventory of past hurts and the role you played in them. This is from the alcoholic's 4th step, but I felt I needed it too. By analyzing my fear I could see that by lacking self reliance I was putting myself in a position to be in fear of abandonment. So I'm working on being self reliant.
And today.......I got a job offer, which I of course accepted!!!!! :day6
I'll be making enough money to support myself and my girls!!! And I only have to work 2 days a week (long days) God rocks!!!
Self reliance here I come!!! I'm hoping this will help to heal the fear issues.