Thanks, oak. It comes and goes, sometimes I'm ok and sometimes I want to call, email, anything. He was a huge part of my life for a long time, it's really hard that he's not around. I'll have moments where I just don't see the point in anything, don't want to bother with my job, and then moments where I'm cool with it, know I'm better off without all his bizarre behavior.
Who knows. Maybe in a couple weeks he'll call. Or maybe in a couple weeks I'll feel like I don't want to speak to him again. Don't know. And why is this such a big deal to me? This is worse than the worst breakup I've ever had, and we never dated.
Deep breath. It'll be ok.