Welcome, I am glad you have found us.
I would not allow my exabf back into my life until his actions were different. When he was active, he would go off on his own (crawl under the rock) without explanation, call days later to say he was so sorry...now that he has been sober and in recovery for 1 year, that type of behavior is non-existent.
I walked away because I did not like the behavior, I would not go back if it had not changed.
Keep reading and posting, and continuing to take good care of yourself.