Originally Posted by
LexieCat 
So, if we are the "experts" why are YOU telling US what we should do?
And why does anything WE say fall on deaf ears?
Man, I appreciate your dropping in for comic relief, but I hope when you've had your fun you don't stick around to hand out advice.
Lexie, I've already started handing out advice on here. You guys are cracking me up though. I know I may seem controlling, but I'm really not.
For the last ime, I am taking in what you guys are saying, that is why I have decided to approach my interest in this guy cautiously.
In regards to your first sentence above, you can't have it both ways.
By virtue of your own stories, about your battles with the alcoholics in your own lives, most of you agree that the drinking HAS to stop. Period. Then, some of you go on to tell me I'm trying to control the situation when I talk of taking action whether that be by interventions or leaving. And no, you can't force the alcoholic to stop drinking, he has to make that decision on his own-at the same time, he may get sick of being fed by a tube in the hospital and put in a straight jacket after you've organized that intervention.
So, which is it guys? Either the drinking has to stop or it doesn't. Period. You can't have it both ways.
Too many family and friends of alcoholics play the victim and enable. If I had to choose from a healthy man and a drunk, of course I'm going to choose healthy. Which is why I'm gonna check this guy out on a couple dates. If thiings progress to the point that we decide to get married and he then becomes a drunk, well, he'd better make some changes fast or get used to the gutter, because that is where I'm leaving him when he falls.