Ahhhh...acceptance. My struggle. Compassion I get, but acceptance... I am still fighting acceptance of my reality for what it is today. I don't want this reality, darn it! I wanted a healthy marriage, not an alcohol fueled battleground! *stomps feet here*
But I am making myself do the actions that I know I need to do to accept today's reality. It doesn't feel good; it feels somehow disloyal and unsupportive of my husband that I am moving on and pursuing the things I need in my life. It finally dawned on me last night that I am more worried about the message I am sending him than I am paying attention to the messages HE is sending ME right now. I am still doing it - worrying all about HIM. Probably time for another Al-Anon meeting.
Thanks for the thread today - its been on my mind and hearing others struggle with it is good for me. This one's challenging!