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Old 02-08-2011, 11:42 AM
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purring
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Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 1
Learning to be healthy

I've been on the alcoholic rollercoaster for 13 years with my AH. I've gotten off many times, and before I knew it, I was back on. I really need to stop my part of this cycle. I'm working on detachment and setting boundaries and sticking to them and learning how to spot the manipulation attempts, but sometimes it is so confusing. I start to consider leaving him, and when he realizes this, he begins recovery, things start to get better between us, then he gradually quits, and they slowly go downhill again, and then we're back to...here.

He's going to AA (again) and is "talking" about going to therapy (again). I'm stepping back from the disease and focusing on healing myself and being a healthier parent to our son at this point. He keeps telling me that he needs my support, that 'it would be nice' if he had my support, that I'm not being supportive.....I sense that it's an attempt to re-establish our unhealthy relationship, but I do wonder if I'm being too cold towards him. I would LOVE to support him with his recovery in a healthy way, but I just don't know how to without being getting back into the cycle. So, how do you give support to a newly recovering alcoholic without being manipulated by the disease?

Thanks for making this site! I'm learning so much
purring
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