Old 02-07-2011, 07:36 AM
  # 18 (permalink)  
stanleyhouse
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: dayton, oh
Posts: 487
Jay
I feel for your situation. My husband and I have been married for almost fourteen years, ten of those I was living in active addiction. In the beginning my husband would say he didn't mind, than he was in denial because everything was going well. Our life worked so well because I could never let the ball drop or there would be questions about my behaviour.
In the end, when there was no denying I was killing myself, all my husband could do was give me a safe place to sleep and some food until I decided to stop. At this point, he was not emotionally involved and our relationship was in shambles.
He will tell you, there is nothing you can do until she decides to stop. I would say that is true. Recognize that she is physically addicted to alcohol, so her body demands the drug or she will become ill. If you ask her to stop, give her suggestions how she is going to get through the withdrawal process.
I've been sober for 16mo. now and my husband and I have a wonderful relationship, better than it ever was. That is due to the fact that we are both in recovery. I think everybody needs recovery in their life, be it marriage, career or spiritual
I credit my recovery to God helping me to help myself. I believe our marriage survived because of my husband's unconditional love for me.
Take care,
SH
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