One time I wrote a letter to my AH--I think I was about 4-5 years into my marriage, and it was a long letter about how I felt and where I felt he was headed.
Not only did it do NOTHING, but he mocked me with some of the phrases in it for years.
I usually resort to the written word to solve other problems, but I will NEVER waste my time writing a letter to him again.
Now I prefer to be more like my mother, whom I used to tease with a take-off on Teddy Roosevelt: She always walked softly and carried a big stick.