Old 02-05-2011, 10:49 AM
  # 40 (permalink)  
Learn2Live
To thine own self be true.
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: U.S.A.
Posts: 5,924
IME, the idea that I can or do control anyone is an illusion. For me, it is a way to maintain order in my mind. I used to be very strong in my attempts to control everything and everyone around me. That kind of thing does not make for nice relationships. Dealing with anyone who did not conform in certain ways would make me go ballistic. Especially if what they said or did contradicted my strongly held beliefs. Anger management has helped in that respect. So has Al-Anon, and yoga. What has also helped is realizing that I take on too much from the people I interact with. Doing that, taking on their stuff, their emotions, their words or behaviors as part of me, causes me some VERY serious problems. I have been learning how to set and maintain personal boundaries over the last couple years. I think it is working. Though I'm sure there is more to it than just boundaries.

Thanks for sharing Marlin.
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