It bugs me that I was so clueless when I met my AH, one of my therapists pointed out to me how he was so much older and still partying with college age kids, not really ever adapting to a real life.
What is really bad for me and maybe just admitting to this right here out loud on SR might help me in my recovery is that I was clueless for probably 15 years into our marriage. Talk about having my own issues.